While kissing is usually associated with pleasure, not business, there are international settings where kissing is an essential part of a proper greeting. Especially in a business environment, where decisions can be made in just a couple of seconds based both on number and interpersonal relationships, it is extremely important to be well-informed regarding the traditions of your business partners.
There are many elements in a greeting sequence, and in many cultures in includes a kiss as a traditional greeting. In other cultures it can be a sign that you are well-respected and accepted in your partners’ social circle. Nevertheless, besides knowing when and who to kiss, an essential detail in demonstrating your businesses kissing skills refers to how and how many times. And believe me, it is in no way pleasant to prepare for a kiss on both cheeks and then be left” in the wind” because your partner comes from a culture where they kiss just once. And it also happened that I left people “in the wind”, because I did not know about the 3 times rule. While some persons would kindly explain you how you should have done it, others just leave it alone as a slightly embarrassing moment. However, in an international business environment nothing says that you are a well prepared, thoughtful and respectful individual than knowing the habits and traditions of your discussion partners.
So, just a few examples from around the world can show you how complicated the world of kissing is. For example, in some regions of France, such as Burgundy, a proper greeting includes 3 kisses on the cheek, while in other areas of the country, including Paris, 2 kisses are enough. The same happens in Brazil, some of my students told me in class. The 3 kisses rule can also be found, for example, in Serbia or in different countries in the Middle East. The kiss on both cheeks rule is rather common around the world, even though, there might be differences regarding on which side to start. Hungarians, for example, start from right to left, while in Portugal from left to right. Other cultures, like the United States, the UK, Belgium and the list can go on, use the one kiss rule.
Other details refer to how formal or informal this form of greeting is considered, how much contact is expected and who initiates the greeting. Nevertheless, cultural differences also reflect on the role of genders in this non-verbal communication act.
Therefore, when discussing about business and formal settings, please remember to do your homework ahead of time. And if you kiss, please tell. Tell us how you do it.
Maria Petrescu, Ph.D., is Assistant Professor of Marketing at the H. Wayne Huizenga School of Business and Entrepreneurship, Nova Southeastern University. She can be reached at mpetresc@nova.edu; http://www.huizenga.nova.edu/Faculty.cfm/mpetresc/Biography
#1 by Jose A Calcano Bastidas on 8/25/14 - 5:25 PM
Although, this is a general thinking and you just need to feel the person you are meeting to know if you can greet with a kiss or no.
#2 by Mallory Macias on 8/25/14 - 7:10 PM
My experience in the business world in the US is that most professionals greet each other by shaking hands. However, most of my personal experience involves interacting with people from various Latin backgrounds and in those situations I have been greeted with a kiss on the cheek, usually just one kiss (maybe I have been cheated out of an extra kiss?!). When I traveled to Argentina to visit my step-sister (she was living and working there at the time), her co-workers greeted her with a kiss on the cheek. I am comfortable with either a hand shake or a kiss on the cheek or both!
Mallory
#3 by Maria on 8/25/14 - 9:47 PM
Thank you very much for these details :) It is great to see what happens in different countries around the Globe.
#4 by Bridget Guerrero on 8/26/14 - 2:25 PM
My culture is very similar to Jose A Calcano. Like Venezuela, in Colombia we also greet people just by kissing once on the right chick. Although we don't greet by kissing when we are doing business specially if we don't know the person. As Jose stated that can be weird, a kiss is used as a symbol of trust and when being greeted by someone in that matter people may assumed that you know the person. So in business we tend to stay away from that. If you are being introduced to a really good friend of the person who is introducing you, and that person is also a very good friend of you then you may kiss on the chick. In most Latin American countries it is very similar on how to greet people. When is comes down to greeting people in the U.S that can be complicated, I believe there is a lot of diversity in the U.S not only in cultures but religions as well. when I get introduced to someone here in the U.S I must almost immediately have to start figuring out if they are Hispanic or not if not a hand shake will do but if yes then the person being introduce to me feels like I am disrespecting them or I am socially awkward. Or even worse that I did not like them, I have had many cases where I have a weird greeting like I.. don't ... want to make it awkward and it's totally awkward. We don't end up giving each other the hand or the kiss on the chick. Most Americans have adapted the kiss on the chick, as a way of greeting with other cultures so if the person is culturally savy they will identify it immediately. One thing that I could say that is completely different is the way you address you r professors in the U.S a kiss is almost forbidden, when in Colombia your professors become your mentor and friend. Another Country that I am fairly familiar with the culture because of my husband being french is France. Talk about complicated there two kisses in some places three kisses in other areas. So confusing so how do you know? you don't, you just have to watch others do it and follow what everyone else is doing that seemed to work for me. by the time that ten people are done say hi to each other you got to go and then you say. It's crazy, one thing I did learn recently here in the U.S is that you do not greet a married Jewish men by either shaking hand or kissing not allowed and if you are a guy definitely do not touch a married jewish women.
I hope my advise helped with kiss in tell
#5 by Morea Arbulu on 8/26/14 - 5:11 PM
Very interesting topic. I come from a Latin American and European family, but was born and raised in South Florida. My family is from Peru,Italy and Russia, so when I have gone to business parties/meetings with them I have noticed that everyone there gives you a kiss on the cheek. (unless it is between males, then it is a hand shake) I have been to several meetings with out knowing anybody and have been bombarded with one kiss on the cheek. Usually the two kisses are for most European Countries, as well as some Latin American ones. I have also worked with people from different cultures here in the States and have encountered both the hand shake, Native Americans, and the one kiss on the cheek, South American countries. Usually within a business setting the only people that have given me a kiss on the cheek when first meeting them have been people from South America. I have been in situations where I have seen or been involved in that awkward moment where one person goes for the hand shake and the other goes for the kiss. Based on my prior experience here in the US, I have given everybody that is from a South American country a kiss on the cheek and the rest of the people I go for the hand shake. Notice how I say South America and not Latin America, that is because I have also noticed that within a business setting the people from Central America are usually more distant, like the USA, than those from South America.
#6 by Maria on 8/26/14 - 9:17 PM
thank you for the information. You are right, in many places shaking hands is usually done for business and in work environments.
#7 by Terri on 8/27/14 - 10:47 AM
I find it interesting that most cultures embrace this custom whereas here in the U.S. I have never seen it be practiced. Americans have a much larger personal space than most Latin countries and we tend to shake hands when meeting someone new either in the business or personal setting.
Once people have become friends on occasion a hug will be given when saying goodbye and sometimes when greeting.
While I prefer not to hug or kiss someone I'm just meeting, I do respect other cultures and will follow suit but I will not initiate.
Great post!
Terri
#8 by Jason Rodriguez on 8/27/14 - 10:59 AM
I am of Cuban descent, and was born and raised in south Florida. It is common from my experience in both business and social settings for men to shake hands or at most shake hands and hug rather than kiss. Kissing would be weird and taboo in this culture. When women greet each other or when men greet women a single kiss on the cheek is considered a social norm. Also, I own a martial arts school and am involved in an international martial arts organization. The martial arts world has a separate culture from the rest of the outside world. From what I have seen in martial arts from martial artists from various regions around the world regardless of their native cultures, martial artists will bow upon meeting or shake hands. Once they are better acquainted or are friendly then their greeting tends to mirror the one that I am accustomed to from my native culture. I have experienced this social norm within the martial arts world to be true in meetings that I have had with people from Latin America, Asia, and Africa. I hope that the experiences that I have shared are helpful to others.
Thank you,
Jason Rodriguez
#9 by Bianca Roberts on 8/27/14 - 4:19 PM
I come from a Latin family where one kiss on the cheek is the accepted rule of meeting someone. I have also been to Europe, for instance, Spain, where two kisses on the cheek is the accepted way of introducing yourself. I was born and raised in Tampa, Fl so I grew up with this background, but also with the procedure of shaking hands to introduce yourself. With both backgrounds, I find it very important to deem one over the other in certain situations because I've found in past experiences, many Americans become uncomfortable when I go in for the kiss on the cheek!
#10 by Jonathan Santillan on 8/27/14 - 9:14 PM
#11 by Maria Petrescu on 8/28/14 - 7:53 AM
#12 by Calla Zentil on 8/29/14 - 9:26 AM
This was a very interesting blog post to read because this happens to be a subject that hits close to home for me! I come from a large family with an Italian background, and within my family it is traditional to kiss twice. Once on each cheek. Well, when I was a little girl I was always confused as to which cheek to kiss first! As you can imagine, this could get awkward when my cousins and I are going for the same side! Though, as I matured, I learned that it is typical of the younger person to lead the kissing, or at least that is how it was explained to me by my Italian grandfather. Usually this means to kiss the right cheek first. You will find it is more natural that way.
I can imagine how awkward this is in an international business scenario, especially now with the consideration of germs and deadly diseases. At what point do you think society will find a 'fist bump' acceptable? I'm not sure that it will ever look professional, but somehow Howie Mandel (celebrity, self-proclaimed germ-a-phobe) is getting away with it!
#13 by Kelsey Muma on 8/29/14 - 11:13 AM
I personally am not from a background where kissing on the cheek is part of a traditional greeting. To me a proper greeting would be something simple such as a hand shake, or maybe a hug if I am close to the person. However, coming to Nova has exposed to many different cultures. In particular I have noticed that almost all of my Italian friends here will use a single kiss on the cheek as a greeting. Also, one of my best friends from Sweden uses the phrase "puss puss" when hanging up the phone with her mother/family; this phrase translates to "kiss kiss" in English.
#14 by Joshua H Luman on 8/31/14 - 8:49 AM
In the United States, I believe kissing, of any sort, is more of a personal behavior that some individuals incorporate into their own repertoire with friends and family, as opposed to a social norm. Americans, generally speaking, tend to prefer shaking hands and are less likely to show any public displays of affection than can be seen in, let's say, France. I, personally, greet friends with either a kiss to the lips or a kiss to both sides of the cheek and, with family, I simply hug and lightly kiss one side of the cheek. However, for business greetings, I will offer my hand unless an existing relationship has already been developed over time. In the event another person offers a kiss to either side of the face, or both, I can easily recognize the cue and offer the same in return. I will say, though, that in traveling to different countries and experiencing unique cultures around the globe, it is quite interesting to see how individuals greet one another. And, to be honest, I actually rather enjoy experiencing other cultures that are more physically approachable and who's social norms involve the kissing of one another in greetings; I believe it forms a stronger sense of community. Anyway, great topic!!! Always interesting to hear and see other people's perspectives on such a topic.
#15 by Dahlia on 8/31/14 - 3:50 PM
#16 by jimmy holman on 8/31/14 - 6:23 PM
"Ah, the ever important bombardment of another person's unkempt mouth gracing not once, nor twice, but thrice my face with exuberant detail...lol"
yeah i find this pretty disgusting as well. often even in a work or social setting, if i shake hands with people i am not readily familiarized with, i am usually off to the restroom for a quick wash, a kiss? not likely.
#17 by Stian Berg on 8/31/14 - 11:16 PM
Very interesting post!
#18 by Maria on 9/1/14 - 12:48 PM
Maria
#19 by Michelle Merida on 10/30/14 - 4:20 PM
This was such an interesting and informative blog post. I am fascinated with learning the customs and traditions of different cultures and societies worldwide, however, I had not heard of the kiss 3 times rule. I have so much to learn! Studying up the traditions of your potential business partners is vital if you want to get the deal. Especially because something you might see as 'common' and 'second nature' they may find to be offensive.
Michelle Merida
#20 by Alanya Emlak on 3/24/17 - 6:11 PM
#21 by Kelsey on 4/12/17 - 10:26 PM
This article caught my eye because I recently attained a job with a local South Florida business that is owned by Brazilians. Before the business opens each morning, as the employees come in, the owner will greet us with a double kiss on the cheeks. As an American I am use to a simple "Hello, good morning", with no physical contact, however since I do not want to come off as rude, I have altered my greeting to match their customs.